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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27762214">hope is a fickle friend</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zofiecfield/pseuds/Zofiecfield'>Zofiecfield</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Haunting of Bly Manor (TV), Wynonna Earp (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Crossover, F/F, Fluff and Angst, One Shot, Spoilers</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 22:08:53</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,303</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27762214</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zofiecfield/pseuds/Zofiecfield</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Nicole and Waverly meet Dani and Jamie at Shorty's Bar, and the conversation takes a turn, leading them down a shared path.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Dani Clayton/Jamie, Waverly Earp/Nicole Haught</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>66</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>hope is a fickle friend</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>A warning for any who need it: a gun gets fired in this fic.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Waverly noticed the pair of women as soon as they walked into Shorty’s Bar. </p><p>It’s uncommon to see new faces in a town like Purgatory, and it’s very uncommon for those new faces to belong to a pair of young women talking quietly in the corner, hands wound together under the table.</p><p>From her perch at the bar, book long since forgotten, Waverly watched them with fondness, that buzzing nostalgia of seeing happy kin amongst strangers. </p><p>They had a map spread out in front of them and were deep in discussion.  One protested a point, laughing and shaking her head as the other leaned over and pressed a quick kiss to her cheek.</p><p>Waverly smiled and felt a pang of longing for Nicole. </p><p>She glanced down to check her watch and then her phone.  Nicole’s shift would be ending any moment.</p><p>“Oi.”</p><p>Waverly jumped at the word, nearly falling off her stool.  One of the women had appeared right behind her.  She had dark curly hair and stood with a hand on one hip, head cocked.</p><p>“Are you gonna keep staring or are you gonna have a drink with us?” she asked, a smirk teasing the corners of her mouth.</p><p>Waverly gaped, searching for an excuse for her behavior. </p><p>“It’s alright,” the woman said, shrugging, all casual and loose limbs.  “Bet you don’t see many pairs like us in a small town like this.  Bit of a spectacle, are we?  I’m Jamie, and that’s Dani, which you’d know already if you’d come over.”</p><p>The other woman, Dani, waved from their table, smiling warmly.</p><p>“That’s not it,” Waverly protested, blushing fiercely.  “Oh god, I’ve been so rude.  I’m Waverly.”</p><p>The door swung open and Nicole walked in, taking off her hat as she did so. </p><p>“And this,” Waverly said, beckoning her over frantically, “is my girlfriend, Nicole.”</p><p>“Nice to meet you both,” Jamie said, sincere, shaking Nicole’s hand. </p><p>She turned to Waverly, the smirk in full force now.  “And you can stop blushing now.  I was just teasing you.  Saw you a mile off, all sunshine and rainbows.  Come on, have a drink with us.” </p><p>She signaled to Doc behind the bar, then walked back to the table, shooting a cheeky grin over her shoulder at Waverly and Nicole.</p><p>“You’ll have to tell me the full story behind that little encounter later,” Nicole whispered as they followed Jamie, chuckling at Waverly’s fluster.</p><p>Waverly shook her head, blushing all over again. </p><p>She looked over and caught Dani watching her.  As Waverly slid into the booth across from them, Dani leaned across the table conspiratorially, nodding towards Jamie.</p><p>“Just ignore her.  She’s a terrible tease,” Dani said.  She grinned at Jamie, who winked and threw an arm around her shoulders.</p><p> </p><p>In the next hour, they became fast friends, finding endless points of discussion. </p><p>They talked over each other, laughed, and teased like old friends, in that way you do when you’ve found yourself with a stranger, so uncannily familiar they might as well be yours already.</p><p>Wynonna came to join them for a bit, with an offering of donuts.  She and Jamie hit it off immediately, bouncing banter back and forth across the table like a ping pong ball. </p><p>Dani and Jamie were passing through Purgatory on a road trip to wherever the road took them.   They told stories of their travels over the past few years.  The Grand Canyon, Amsterdam, London, Paris.</p><p>Waverly sighed at the mentions of Paris and London. </p><p>“I’ve barely ever left this town,” she said, wistfully.  “I’d love to travel.”</p><p>Nicole nudged her with an elbow, grinning.  “Let’s plan to go next year!  We could meet up with these two.”</p><p>Waverly beamed at the idea, turning excitedly to Dani and Jami. </p><p>Her smiled faltered. </p><p>Underneath the warmth and contentment, something faint had passed across Dani’s face, a loss or a longing.  As it did, Jamie had shifted ever so slightly closer to Dani, the slightest squeeze of a hand.</p><p>Waverly let it pass for the moment, filing it away to consider later.</p><p>But, it wasn’t the last time she saw this as the conversation flowed.  A handful of times, that flicker of pain, and she began to wonder.</p><p> </p><p>“I’ll go get another round of drinks,” Waverly said.  “And maybe some snacks.”</p><p>She rose and walked towards the bar, where Doll sat nursing a cup of coffee.  She slid onto the stool next to him. </p><p>“Another round?” Doc stepped behind the counter. </p><p>“Please, and whatever snacks you have?” </p><p>He tossed her a jar of pretzels and started pouring the drinks.  He added four waters to the tray as well, just for safe keeping.</p><p>“Made some new friends?” Dolls asked, peering over his shoulder towards the table.  He returned to his coffee.</p><p>“Yeah.  They’re just passing through, and they’re lovely,” she said, hesitating at the end.</p><p>“And?”</p><p>Waverly sighed a little and leaned in so they wouldn’t be overheard. </p><p>“There’s something about her. Dani, the blonde one,” she said in a low voice.  “Underneath everything else.  This sadness.  It feels familiar.  It feels <em>wrong</em>.”</p><p>“She haunted,” Dolls said, without looking up.  “Noticed it when I walked in.  Ghost, I think, and a bad one too.”</p><p>“Haunted?”  Waverly looked back at the women, sadness creeping across her face, followed quickly by determination.</p><p>“Well, we can fix haunted,” she said.</p><p>Dolls and Doc exchanged a knowing look. </p><p>“Waverly,” Doc started, sliding the tray of drinks towards her, “some of us would give anything to rid ourselves of our demons, but-”</p><p>“Not everyone with demons wants be rid of them,” Dolls finished for him.  “And of those who do, not all of those demons are willing to go.  Sometimes the line between you and it is just too blurry to separate cleanly.  It’s part of you.”</p><p>“Like an m&amp;m,” Wynonna chimed in, hopping onto a stool next to Dolls.  He rolled his eyes. </p><p>“What?  I’m being helpful!” Wynonna protested, then leaned past him to see Waverly.  “What are we talking about?”</p><p>Waverly brought her up to speed in brief.</p><p>“And as I was saying,” Doc said, picking the trail of the conversation back up, “even if you do want rid of your demon, <em>and</em> you can convince it to go, sometimes you have reason to keep it.  Sometimes you took it on willingly in the first place.”</p><p>He glanced towards Wynonna as he finished, and she met his eyes for a moment before looking away.</p><p>“Just make sure you’re ready to walk away if she’s not looking for help, or if there’s no help to be had,” Dolls said, laying a hand on Waverly’s shoulder.</p><p>“Of course,” she said brightly, “but we’ve seen way worse than a cute woman with a ghost.  We can fix this, guys!”</p><p>She hopped off her stool, pretzels under one arm and the tray of drinks balanced on the other.</p><p>“Don’t make any promises,” Dolls called after her, but she pretended not to hear.</p><p> </p><p>When Waverly returned to the table, she pulled the conversation in a new direction, slowly at first, then with a stronger tug.</p><p>Amidst the laughter and sighs, amidst the stories of travel and love, allies and prejudice, families and comedic small home disasters, she began to slip in stories about the weirdness of Purgatory, the otherness of this town. </p><p>First, she chose the only the funny bits, and painted them with a base coat to obscure.  But as the minutes and stories ticked by, she lifted the veil more and more.</p><p>Nicole eyed her warily as she went on, still in the dark and increasingly uncertain of the game plan. </p><p>The first time Waverly said the word <em>demon</em>, Nicole whipped around with a start.</p><p>“Waves?” she whispered, urgent.  “What are you doing?”</p><p>Waverly met her eyes for a quick moment, a plea for patience and trust, immediately granted, despite misgivings.  Waverly carried on with the story. </p><p>Half an hour of stories and another pint later, Jamie leaned back and sucked her teeth, considering Waverly.  After a long moment, she shifted forward onto her elbows and started a story of her own.</p><p>“Dani and I, we met in a little village called Bly one summer, a few years back.  It was an eerie little place, kind of like this one.”</p><p>Waverly sat up a little straighter, catching the thread offered.  “Bly, like Bly Manor?”</p><p>“Heard of it, have you?” </p><p>Waverly nodded, and chose her words carefully.  “I was researching hauntings a few months ago, and I read an article about Bly Manor.” </p><p>Her eyes shifted to Dani, and she watched her closely as she continued.  “About Bly and the disappearances there.  The rumored hauntings.  The Lady of the Lake.” </p><p>Dani’s face paled and her eyes ticked to the glass of water at her elbow.</p><p>Waverly saw her window and pushed it open.  “All the disappearances in Bly stopped a few summers back, didn’t they?”</p><p>“Jamie,” Dani said, reaching out for her hand, knuckles pale.  “I think we should go.”</p><p>Jamie caught the quiver in her voice and nodded, concern now evident across her face.  “Yeah, alright, Love.”</p><p>Jamie smiled at Nicole and Waverly, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes.</p><p>“Talk a bit much when I’ve had a drink or two,” she said.  “Time to go.  Thanks for the chat.  It was nice.”</p><p>As they rose, Waverly reached out to grasp Dani’s wrist.</p><p>“Dani, wait.  I think we can help,” she said.  “Please, hear me out.”</p><p>Jamie placed a hand over hers, and Waverly drew back. </p><p>“You can’t help us,” Jamie said softly.  Her expression was very kind, and quite sad.  “Doesn’t matter how many monsters you’ve sent home crying.  You can’t touch this one.” </p><p>Jamie wrapped an arm around Dani and together they headed out into the crisp night. </p><p> </p><p>Waverly watched them go in stunned silence.</p><p>Nicole squeezed her hand, ducking to catch her eyes.  “Hey, Waves?  I think you need to fill me in now.”</p><p>Waverly hastily brushed tears from her eyes.  She looked down at the table.</p><p>“Lore has it that the grounds of Bly Manor are haunted by the ghost of a woman, in anger and despair.  They call her the Lady of the Lake.  There have been disappearances over the years there, and deaths, many of them.  But then, a few years back, it all stopped.  There are theories about why, some more believable than others.  Most think the Lady is lying in wait.  It’s a terrible story, and I think Dani and Jamie are caught in the middle of it.  I think it’s Dani she’s waiting for.”</p><p>She looked up at Nicole, who was watching her with concern. </p><p>Waverly didn’t wait to hear what she would say, didn’t want to hear it.  She set her jaw in determination.</p><p>“Dolls said not to make any promises.  He said some demons can’t be fixed.  But we’re going to fix this.”</p><p> </p><p>Jamie and Dani walked until Dani’s hands stopped shaking. </p><p>“Sorry about that, Dani,” Jamie said, eyes on the ground.  “I shouldn’t have said anything.”</p><p>“No, no,” Dani said, stopping and tugging her close.  “It’s okay.  We so rarely get to talk about it with anyone who might understand.  I just didn’t expect it to hit quite so hard.” </p><p>She touched Jamie’s cheek sweetly, then caught her chin to pull her into kiss.  Jamie held back for a moment, but soon relented into the softness.</p><p>“Come on.  Let’s sit.”  Dani pulled Jamie over to a bench, and Jamie wrapped an arm tightly around her.</p><p>They sat for a few minutes in silence, letting the benign night sounds organize their thoughts.</p><p>Dani spoke first.  “What if they really could help?”</p><p>Jamie looked at her in surprise.  “Would you consider it?  If they could?”</p><p>“Maybe.  But it would be hard to have hope.  Hard to have even a hope of hope.  Because if I started to hope, and then they couldn’t help… I’m not sure I could bear it.”</p><p>She reached over and found Jamie’s hand in the dim light of the streetlamp.  “What do you think?”</p><p>Jamie took a deep breath then shifted to face Dani fully.  She reached up to cradle Dani’s face in her hand.  Dani pressed a kiss into her palm.</p><p>“I'm not fond of the idea of losing you, Dani.  If I could, I’d rip her out of you myself.  I’d clean the edges and mend the tears, and you’d be alright.  Just to see you without that weight on you all the time...”</p><p>She paused, swallowing hard. </p><p>They didn’t talk like this often.  It’s hard to live in the moment and embrace each day when the future is breathing down your neck, when you let yourself think about what’s waiting in the darkness.</p><p>“But hope is a dangerous thing, you’re right.  I understand that.  And it isn't up to me, Poppins.  It's up to you.  You don't need fixing.  You were everything before her and you're everything still.”</p><p>She leaned in and pressed her forehead to Dani’s.  “You're mine and I’m yours, either way, for as long we we've got.”</p><p>Dani wrapped her arms around Jamie, and they stayed like that for a long moment.</p><p>“I think I’d like to hear what they have to say,” Dani said, finally.</p><p>Jamie nodded.  “Okay then.  We’ll find them in the morning.  And we can walk away, anytime.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Jamie and Dani went to the bar in the morning, but found it locked and empty. </p><p>“No brunch, then, I guess,” Jamie said, just to see Dani smile.  The fear and uncertainty were wrapped tightly around her, and it pained Jamie to see.</p><p>They went next to the Sheriff’s Station.</p><p>Nicole saw them before they saw her.  She rose and slipped towards them, catching their elbows before they could ask for her at the front desk. </p><p>“Hey, you two,” she said, pulling them off to the side.  “Can get you a cup of tea?  We could talk for a bit, just us?”</p><p>Jamie nodded, grateful for the tea and, far more so, for the quiet understanding.</p><p>A moment later, mugs in hand, Nicole led them to a small meeting room and closed the door behind them.</p><p>“We should be undisturbed in here,” she said, taking a seat across the table from them. </p><p>She considered them both thoughtfully, concern in her eyes.  “How did you sleep?”</p><p>Jamie smiled a sad, tired sort of smile, and ran a thumb across Dani’s knuckles.  “There have been better nights.”</p><p>Dani took a shaky breath. </p><p>“Do you think they could really help?” she asked, too on edge for pleasantries.</p><p>Nicole ran a hand down her tight braid, searching Dani's face for the right answer, an answer that would be both true and kind. </p><p>“We’ve faced a lot of demons, all of us,” she said.  “But we’ve also faced a lot of loss, Waverly especially.  And grief like that can be blinding.  So yes, they might be able to help.  <em>We</em> might be able to help.  But, there’s no guarantee.  No matter what anyone says.”</p><p>Dani sat back in the chair and her eyes went distant for a long moment.  Then she turned to Jamie, checking her face one last time, for acceptance and understanding.</p><p>Silly of her to check, really.  It was there, like always.  But comforting to see it in this moment, nonetheless.</p><p>Dani turned back to Nicole.  “Okay.  Let’s talk.”</p><p>“You’re sure?” Nicole asked.</p><p>Dani nodded.</p><p>“I’ll call the team.  Wait here.”</p><p> </p><p>They gathered in the BBD office and made introductions. </p><p>Then, with a deep breath and a shudder, Dani began to recount the full story.  Within a few minutes, despite the set of her shoulders, despite the determination in her jaw, she was tremoring head to foot, forcing words out through chattering teeth.</p><p>Until then, Jamie had hung back, speaking only to add small details or history.  But when she could no longer bear it, she walked forward and knelt next to Dani, placing a hand over hers to still them.</p><p>Jamie told the rest of the story, in even measure. </p><p>As the story went on and the conclusion became more and more inevitable, the gravity of it weighed heavily on the room. </p><p>“That’s it, that’s the story,” Jamie finished.  “Not much to do now but live like we aren’t waiting.”</p><p>Dani smiled at her softly, through tear-rimmed eyes.</p><p>Waverly leaned forward and reached for Dani’s hand.  “We’ll fix it.  We always do.”</p><p>Dolls cleared his throat, amending, “We’ll try our best.”</p><p> </p><p>The morning passed with endless strings of questions and debates.</p><p>Jeremy mapped out chemical combinations on half of the whiteboard and caused only one small explosion, leaving the room wreaking of pond scum. </p><p>Doc sat quietly in the corner, on the phone with Kate and other old connections, jotting down notes.      </p><p>Wynonna and Dolls sifted through years of BBD cases, pushing promising files across the table to each other in wordless synchrony.</p><p>Nicole sat with Jamie and Dani, keeping their minds at ease as best she could while reviewing newspaper archives from the areas surrounding Bly and sites of similar hauntings.</p><p>They called around the room when ideas arose. </p><p>The list of possibilities on the whiteboard grew longer, but with each new line, another was crossed off.  A possibility for a moment, and then, with the strike of a marker, an impossibility.</p><p>Waverly knelt on the floor in the corner, surrounded by a dozen dusty volumes.  Deep in concentration, she rarely looked up or spoke to the others.</p><p>She had papers and notes spread around her, her handwriting deteriorating as the morning wore on.  She murmured to herself in Latin and other languages long since lost.  Scrubbed the paper with her eraser until she’d worn through.</p><p>As noon approached, Wynonna looked up and saw the fatigued faces of her family and of their new friends, and the list on the board, nullified in its entirety. </p><p>And then she saw Waverly in the corner, working with tears in her eyes as she furiously flipped through a thick book, nearly ripping its pages. </p><p>“I think it’s time we all took a break for lunch,” Wynonna said, loud enough to pull them all from their focused fogs.</p><p>“Let’s keep going a little longer,” Waverly said, voice rising dangerously, to the edge of panic.  “We haven’t found a solution yet, but we’ll fix it.  We always do.”</p><p>Wynonna took a knee next to Waverly and put a hand on her shoulder.  “No, Baby Girl, we don’t.”</p><p>Waverly tried to push her away, but she wouldn’t be moved. </p><p>“Stop it, Wynonna,” Waverly said sharply, having climbed to a breaking point without realizing it.  “We have to fix this.”</p><p>Wynonna held her ground.  “No one gets to stay forever.  Think of how many times we’ve found ourselves on that edge.  It’s only a matter of time before-”</p><p>“Stop it,” Waverly said again, louder this time, the words spilling from her with harsh tears.</p><p>Wynonna glanced up at Dolls.  He hid his hurt better than most, but it was visible there, on the edges. </p><p>“It’s the truth, and you know it,” Wynonna said, voice low and steady. “Sometimes we win, and sometimes the battle was lost before it even began.”</p><p>Eyes wild, Waverly turned away from her, searching the room and finding Nicole.  “Nicole?” </p><p>Nicole looked back sadly, her eyes confirming everything Wynonna had said.  With a sharp intake of breath, Waverly tore her eyes away.</p><p>It was Jamie who caught her eye and managed to hold. </p><p>Quietly, from the corner of the room where she sat, she said, “When you make the choice to love someone, you choose to accept that you’ll lose them someday.  And that day can come, at any time, for anyone.  Dani and I, we just see the outline of the hourglass a little more clearly.  Nothing’s endless, anyway, and you’d be a fool to think it is.” </p><p>She said this kindly, but the words were unflinching and stung as they landed.</p><p>Waverly stood very still, shivering.  She did not look away. </p><p>Dani leaned against Jamie, resting her head on Jamie’s shoulder. </p><p>“We love loudly now,” Jamie continued, so softly the room hushed to listen, “so later, when the world falls too quiet, there is an echo of us still.”</p><p>She let the room fall into silence for a long moment.</p><p>“We’re not giving up yet,” Wynonna said, pulling Waverly’s gaze to her, “but…”</p><p>Waverly stood and nodded once, then walked away.  The door clicked shut behind her.</p><p>“I’ll go,” Nicole said, already halfway to the door.  She caught Wynonna’s eye and nodded.  “She’ll be okay.  Why don’t you guys order pizza?”</p><p> </p><p>Nicole found Waverly sitting on a curb outside the station, face already wet with tears.</p><p>“Hey,” she said softly, sitting down.</p><p>Waverly wiped her face on her sleeve. </p><p>“I’ve lost too many people, Nicole.  And the list just keeps growing.  I wake up every day and wonder who I’ll lose next.”</p><p>Nicole said nothing.  Just held her hand and listened.</p><p>“Those two, they don’t deserve that, Nicole.  They don’t deserve that kind of suffering.”</p><p>She turned suddenly, her voice rising in panic.  “That could be us.  Any day now, that could be us.”</p><p>Nicole shifted closer but let her go on.</p><p>“How do they bear it?  How does Jamie watch Dani suffer, watch the time tick away?  And Dani, my god, how does she carry that weight?  The weight of the darkness, but also, the weight of being loved like that.”</p><p>Waverly stilled under the heft of her own questions, resting her forehead on her knees while Nicole rubbed slow eights on her back.</p><p>Finally, Waverly sat up, emptier now and clearer for it.</p><p>“I love you, Nicole Haught.  And if the world tears us apart tomorrow, you should know it.  I love you now and nothing will ever stop me from loving you.”</p><p>“I love you too,” Nicole said.  She kissed her softly and gently wiped away the tracks of tears down her cheeks. </p><p> </p><p>They ate pizza together, the lot of them, scattered in chairs and across the floor. </p><p>For half an hour amidst the day, they spoke easily as friends.  They laughed and enjoyed the good company.</p><p>For a moment, they set their weight down and were free of it. </p><p>That is how they carry on with their burdens.  Moments of rest like these.</p><p> </p><p>Hours later, all the books had been opened, the whiteboards filled, and still, they had found no solution that satisfied and held its shape when examined closely.</p><p>Each, in their own quiet, steeled themselves, braced to accept the end of the road.</p><p>Wynonna was pacing the room, restless, lost in her thoughts.  She stopped in front of Dolls, abruptly.</p><p>“Dolls, what if I shot it, with Peacemaker?”</p><p>“You’d kill her,” he said without hesitation, an answer but not an end to the discussion.  But he kept listening, open.</p><p>“It’s the only thing we haven’t considered yet,” Wynonna continued, starting to pace again.  “It was blue when I shot Willa.  It knew her, it knew she wasn’t a demon.”</p><p>Dolls was nodding along as she talked, one foot tapping a steady rhythm against the desk. </p><p>“Dolls, if we caught it, right in the moment before it overtakes her, at that very last minute.  Would the gun know?  Could it see them both and know they are different?  And take only one?”</p><p>“There is a long history of sentient weapons cleaving good from evil,” Waverly pitched in.  Her voice was tired still, but laced ever so slightly with hope again.  “This wouldn’t be so different.”</p><p>She looked down at her hands, suddenly.  “And I could-”</p><p>Dolls shook his head, silencing her.  He looked up at Dani.  “It would be a long shot,” he said, pulling no punches.</p><p>“No pun intended,” Jeremy offered in a deflated version of his usual spunk.</p><p>Dolls ignored him and continued.  “There is a chance, they’re right, but it is a very, very slim.  A slim chance that will exist in a single moment, and even then…”</p><p>Dani’s brow furrowed as she listened, her jaw set.  “Just to make sure I’m understanding,” she said, turning to Wynonna, “you’d shoot me?”</p><p>“I’d shoot <em>it</em>,” Wynonna clarified.  “That’s the hope anyway.  But since you and it are both <em>you</em>… yes.  I’d shoot you.”</p><p>“And then?”  Dani had paled but her voice held steady.</p><p>Wynonna turned and met Waverly’s eyes for a moment, considering her words carefully. </p><p>Waverly nodded, and spoke the words for her.  “And then I’d try to save the piece of you that is you.”  </p><p>Her voice was heavier now, as her part in this plan, and the uncertainty and horror it could bear, began to settle on her shoulders.</p><p>“And <em>it</em> would go to Hell,” Wynonna finished. </p><p>“And if that doesn’t work?” Dani asked, already knowing the answer.</p><p>“You’d die,” Wynonna said.  She was tempted to lie now, but she didn’t.  Lies wouldn’t save Dani, any more than the truth would.  “Or it would take you with it.  To Hell.”</p><p>Jamie stood suddenly, slapping an open palm to the table, hard enough to sting. </p><p>“Alright,” she said, clipped.  “That’s enough of that, I think.”</p><p>Dani turned to her and held her eyes, imploring.</p><p>“Jesus, Dani,” Jamie whispered softly in horror, seeing the decision in Dani’s eyes.  The words escaped her in a lost breath and her shoulders fell.  She searched Dani’s face, but found nothing there to reassure her. </p><p>Jamie pinched her lips together, but, despite the pain and fear painted across her face, sat back down and said nothing further. </p><p>This was love after all, not possession. </p><p>Dani turned back to Dolls.  “At the very last minute, right?  That’s when she’d shoot?”</p><p>“Yes.  The very last minute, when the line separating you and it is about to snap.”</p><p>Dani’s gripped Jamie’s hand tightly but did not look away from Dolls.</p><p>“You don’t have to decide now,” he said, softly, knowing she already had.  “A last resort is just that.  Take my card, and call when the time comes, if-”</p><p>He trailed off, but Dani understood.  She nodded and took the card.</p><p>“Wait.”  Wynonna stepped forward.  She bent over the card in Dani’s hand and wrote on the back.  “That’s my number too.  Just in case.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>They all walked out of that room and parted ways, back into the lives they had been living.</p><p>Only those lives have been shifted, just slightly, by hope and by the dread hope brings.</p><p>You see, hope gives you something to cling to when all else is lost.  But it will abandon you with no warning, it will walk away and never look back.  And that, the risk of its loss, is a dreadful thing.</p><p> </p><p>Jamie and Dani continued on.  Quiet days in the flower shop, travels when they could, sweet nights side by side. </p><p>They watched the days go by, trying quite hard to think only of the day they stood in, not the next or the next or the next. </p><p>Trying quite hard not to think of the small card Dani kept in the bedside table. </p><p>Trying quite hard not to think of the flicker of hope it offered, for fear of snuffing it out.</p><p> </p><p>The Purgatory crew also returned to their regular lives.  They loved and fought and won and lost and carried on.</p><p>Postcards arrived every now and then from New York and London and Chicago. </p><p>They hung each on the fridge with a fond smile, but soon let their eyes skim past it. </p><p>They tried quite hard not to think of the suffering born by that pair, or of the weight they carried. </p><p>They tried not to think of the darkness waiting for Dani.  It as a reminder of the darkness waiting for each of them in turn.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Years later but far too soon, the call came.</p><p>Wynonna woke in the middle of the night, heart already sinking as she lunged for the phone.</p><p>It was time.  Or so nearly time that there was none left to spare.</p><p>                   </p><p>The plane ride was too long. </p><p>Wynonna, Waverly, and Nicole sat in tense silence, awaiting the tragedy to come. </p><p>In the taxi from the airport, the driver perked up, excited at the address.  “Bly Manor?  Surely you’ve heard the stories?”</p><p>They ignored him, too wrapped up in their impending grief, to wounded already from a battle yet to be fought.</p><p>He fell into silence alongside them, unnerved.</p><p> </p><p>They arrived and wasted no time.  They tore across the grounds and into the clearing, shouting Dani’s name. </p><p>She was already there, in the lake to her ankles, water seeping slowly up her dress, darkness spreading.</p><p>Her body stood slack, shoulders lose and arms hanging, face blank. </p><p>She raised her head slightly, seeing them tumble towards her.  A small smile flitted across her lips, too weak to stick. </p><p>“Good timing, guys,” she said, her voice already shallow and wet, already waterlogged.</p><p>Suddenly, she tensed and folded, gripping her stomach and screaming through clenched teeth.  It lasted only a moment but left her all the more deflated.</p><p>“Hang in there,” Wynonna called to her. </p><p>Wynonna glanced back at Waverly, who had frozen, eyes wide and fixed on Dani.  “Come on, Baby Girl,” she said softly.</p><p>Waverly’s eyes snapped to Wynonna’s and she nodded.  She dug in her bag and shoved a notebook into Nicole’s hands. </p><p>“Start chanting and don’t stop until I tell you to,” she ordered, firm, her face a hard mask of tamped down panic. </p><p>Nicole nodded and took the notebook, but Waverly didn’t let go.  Meeting Nicole’s eyes, she said again, “Don’t stop.  Even after.  Don’t stop.”</p><p>She released the notebook then, and crossed to the other side of the clearing, just a foot from the water’s edge.  She hunkered down low, her body taut and ready.  She waited, eyes glued to Dani.</p><p>Nicole began to chant.</p><p> </p><p>Dani snapped through her haze suddenly.  She looked up at Wynonna.</p><p>“Where’s Xavier?”</p><p>Wynonna said nothing.  Just met her eyes and held them, and that said it all. </p><p>Dani nodded once, lips tight, her brow furrowing for just a moment. </p><p> </p><p>Wynonna raised the gun and it flared red.</p><p>“It’s almost time, Dani.  You need to pull yourself from her.  You need to find that line and hold it for a moment longer.”</p><p>Dani met her eyes, but any focus or understanding in them was drowning in rage and pain.</p><p>“Dani,” Wynonna said again, urgent.</p><p>“Wynonna?”  Waverly’s voice was hushed to a breaking point.  “Wynonna, what if we’re too late?”</p><p>“We’re not.”  Wynonna shook the gun sharply, voice low through gritted teeth. </p><p>To the gun more than to anyone else, she hissed, “Come on.”</p><p>Dani doubled over in pain again. </p><p>The scream that tore from her was mixed with another. </p><p>Jamie ran into the clearing, Dani’s name on her lips. </p><p>Jamie stopped hard when she saw the gun, her eyes tracing its path to the water.</p><p>“Dani,” she breathed. </p><p>Dani pulled herself back up to standing and found Jamie’s eyes.  For a brief moment, her face was her own again, alive and present.</p><p>The gun flickered blue for a heartbeat, then back to red.</p><p>“That was good, Dani,” Wynonna called.  “Come on, you need to hold it just a second longer.”</p><p>Pain ripped through Dani again and she stumbled back deeper into the lake.  The water rippled, welcoming her in. </p><p>“I can’t,” she whispered, forcing the words from her body, eyes wild now.  “We’re out of time.  She’s coming.”</p><p>For a moment, her face shifted, blurring at the edges into someone else, some<em>thing </em>else.</p><p>“Fuck this,” Jamie muttered from where she stood at the edge.  She spat the words out again.  “Fuck this.”</p><p>She began to walk towards the water.</p><p>“Jamie,” Wynonna called in a low warning.  “Stay back.”</p><p>Jamie ignored her, ignored all of them.  Eyes fixed on Dani and Dani alone. </p><p>She approached head on, wading into the water with sure strides. </p><p>When she reached Dani, she cupped Dani’s chin in her hands. </p><p>“One breath at a time, Poppins, one breath at a time,” she whispered before slipping around behind Dani, an arm trailing across her belly. </p><p>Jamie wrapped her arms tightly around Dani, pressing her body against Dani’s back.  She kissed Dani’s neck, already clammy and sweating pond water. </p><p>She pressed her lips to the skin over and over, whispering words for Dani and Dani alone.</p><p>As she did, something else began to seep into the haze of pain and rage and fear gripping Dani’s heart.  Something quiet. </p><p>Two hearts beating in tandem on a rainy night.  Bare feet dancing in the kitchen to an off-key tune.  Pots boiling over while they were tangled up together against the counter, too preoccupied notice or care. </p><p>Understanding and unconditional, acceptance and sacrifice.</p><p>Peace. </p><p>The gun flickered blue, then red, then blue again.  A demon and a mercy.</p><p>“Wynonna,” Waverly said, quietly.  “You have to catch it as it changes.”</p><p>“I know,” Wynonna shot back, jaw tight.  “I know.” </p><p>Wynonna squared her shoulders and stared down the barrel of the gun, finger on the trigger now.  “I’m so fucking sick of watching good people die.”</p><p>Jamie found Dani’s hand and laced their fingers together, pressing their palms to Dani’s chest, one thumb softly sliding over the gold band.</p><p>Jamie looked up, meeting Wynonna’s eyes, and gave a quick hard nod.</p><p> </p><p>The gun flickered again, and in that thin purple line of indecision, Wynonna fired.</p><p> </p><p>Waverly was on her feet, running towards them before the bodies even hit the water.  She might as well have had wings.  Heart pounding in fear but hands steady, ready.  Fingertips tingling with promise and a prayer.</p><p>Nicole dropped to her knees at the sound of the shot but didn’t look up from the page.  She kept chanting, without pause.</p><p>Wynonna just stood.  Heart breaking as the fire roared up on the surface of the lake.</p><p>
  
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Dear reader,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Hope is a fickle friend.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>It will lure you up and up and up, heart lighter as you go.  But it offers no easy descent, no ladder on which to climb when hope takes its leave.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>It will abandon you with no choice but to close your eyes and plunge into unknown waters.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Not every story has a happy ending.  Not every tragedy takes a turn.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>This story can end here, and you can hold your hope gingerly and walk away.  You can tell yourself all was fine.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Or you can read on and take the risk of the plunge.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Z</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  
</p><p>“Wynonna, we need to go,” Waverly called, slipping on her jacket.</p><p>Nicole and Jeremy waited by the door, ready.</p><p>“Coming, coming,” Wynonna said, appearing from the bathroom, adjusting her dress.</p><p>Waverly checked them all over with a serious eye.</p><p>“Jeremy, your tie is crooked,” she said, fixing it for him before he could respond.</p><p>Doc opened the front door and peeked in.  “The car’s warm.  We’d better go, or we’ll be late.”</p><p> </p><p>The drove in silence, all thinking about the evening ahead, and about the years that had brought them here.</p><p>“I wish Dolls was here,” Waverly said, quietly.</p><p>Wynonna squeezed her knee gently.  “Me too, Baby Girl.”</p><p> </p><p>Vermont was beautiful that time of year, snow falling softly as they arrived.  The small stone church was adorned in red flowers, stark against the white.</p><p>A black car was parked by the entrance way, ready and waiting.</p><p>Wynonna looked over in time to catch Waverly brushing a tear from her cheek with the back of a gloved hand. </p><p>Wynonna gave her a little shove.  “Don’t start that yet.  You’ll get me going too.”</p><p>Even as she said it, she reached up to clear the corner of her eye.</p><p>The entered the church arm in arm and slipped into the third pew. </p><p>The space, seating no more than 20, was full and quiet, everyone hushed with their own thoughts.</p><p> </p><p>The bells rang on the hour. </p><p>Jamie walked through the side door and took her place at the front. </p><p>In deep green, she stood tall and looked around the room.  Face steady, though her hands were shaking hard. </p><p>Tears already streaming down her cheeks.</p><p>She spotted them in their pew and a shiver ran through her.  A small smile, a deep breath.  Then she looked away, at risk of falling apart entirely.</p><p> </p><p>Waverly ducked her head to wipe her eyes again, stifling a sob.</p><p> </p><p>The music began, soft and warm and enveloping.</p><p>At the creak of the doors, everyone turned, breath held.</p><p>In the doorway stood Dani, in pale green.  She grinned at Jamie, who took one shuddering breath and stepped from the altar.</p><p>Whatever dainty procession had been planned was lost as they rushed down the aisle towards each other.</p><p>Whatever dark memories and <em>what ifs</em> had clung to them dissipated entirely as they collided in the middle, shear love and gratitude.</p><p>They kissed and held each other like their lives depended on it, or rather, like their lives had indeed depended on it. </p><p>They’d been together only a couple of hours before, in the last quiet moments before getting into their dresses.  But in this space, on this night, hours apart may as well have been years.</p><p>The onlookers cheered and whooped, clapping and stomping their feet, filling the chamber with their joy.</p><p>Through the din, the priest cleared his throat loudly.  Silence fell. </p><p>Jamie and Dani broke apart and pressed their foreheads together, laughing and crying.</p><p>“Ladies, if you’d please?”  He gestured to the empty altar.</p><p>Hand in hand, grinning wildly, they approached the altar.</p><p>The priest waited patiently through another round of shouting and laughter, and a second stolen kiss. </p><p>Waverly sobbed openly as she cheered.  Nicole held her tightly, grinning ear to ear.</p><p>“Friends and family, we are gathered here today, the 24<sup>th</sup> of December, to celebrate the loving union of Jamie and Dani.  If you’d all please take your seats, we’ll begin.”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>The end</em>
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